Monday, March 14, 2011
Fix Your Marriage
Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
Dear reader, I know that no marriage is perfect. No doubt, you are probably struggling in some aspect of your marriage even now.
When we consider all the aspects of marriage; communication, health, finances, children, in-laws, sex, work, conflict-resolution, etc., we find that the enemy, whose job it is to steal, kill and destroy, has launched an all-out attack on almost every marriage.
It is the Lord's desire that your marriage honor Him, picture Jesus' relationship with the church, and bring us a little bit of heaven on earth. Unfortunately, sometimes it seems a little more like the other place!
I have learned this, whatever can be talked out can be worked out. The marriage you are presently in is worth building into a God honoring, productive, thoroughly satisfying relationship that is an example and encouragement to everyone you know. You CAN and you MUST do it.
I have also learned that love is not an emotion, but a choice. We volitionally will to love somebody. I have heard people say, "I just don't love them anymore." Or, "They have killed my love for them." We are commanded to love our mate, whether we feel like it or not. I understand, strong feelings and goose bumps can wane. However, God wills that you find help in Him, good counsel from others and a resolve to get things fixed as soon as possible.
One evangelist I know says that many a lesbian could have been saved with a rose. How true! Many spouses just need a little love shown to them once again. They could use the same kind of attention showed to them back in the dating stages of the relationship. If we would put our pride aside and take the initiative to begin the rebuilding process in our marriage, amazing results are possible.
I guarantee you that the grass is never greener on the other side. So get some help and start figuring out what steps can be taken to repair your relationship.
A few hints:
Always plan to go the extra mile. Do your part and a bunch more.
Give yourselves to each other without reserve.
Get back in shape.
Speak kindly and never in anger.
Don't let pride, or being right, come in between the two of you.
Put your spouse on a pedestal.
Highly prioritize your mate.
Protect your mate, always put up for them in front of others.
Respect and be respectable.
Romance each other.
Express your love daily; kiss, cuddle and tell them you love them.
Relieve their burdens.
Submit to one another.
Go to church together.
Read the Bible and pray together.
Have some common interests.
Don't allow the children to rule the roost.
Have a weekly date night.
Don't allow the TV to dominate your home.
Be aware of devilish temptation, it will damage your marriage.
Beware of ungodly counsel (friends at work, etc.)
As I Cor 13 tells us, be patient, kind, longsuffering and hopeful. behave and be humble. Be not envious or jealous. Think the best about one another.
This is just a partial list of things needed in your marriage.
I am reminded of the woman who said to her husband, “How come you never tell me you love me anymore?” He said, “I told you that way back in the beginning, if anything ever changes, I’ll let you know!”
That kind of reasoning is why so many marriages are in trouble. Too much is taken for granted.
Start today to make your marriage honorable in all.