Tuesday, September 16, 2014

The Anti-Christmas



Rev 11:7  And when they shall have finished their testimony, the beast that ascendeth out of the bottomless pit shall make war against them, and shall overcome them, and kill them. 8  And their dead bodies shall lie in the street of the great city, which spiritually is called Sodom and Egypt, where also our Lord was crucified. 9  And they of the people and kindreds and tongues and nations shall see their dead bodies three days and an half, and shall not suffer their dead bodies to be put in graves. 10  And they that dwell upon the earth shall rejoice over them, and make merry, and shall send gifts one to another; because these two prophets tormented them that dwelt on the earth. 11  And after three days and an half the Spirit of life from God entered into them, and they stood upon their feet; and great fear fell upon them which saw them. 12  And they heard a great voice from heaven saying unto them, Come up hither. And they ascended up to heaven in a cloud; and their enemies beheld them.

So, here are these nit-wits throwing a gala like it's the end of the world. Little do they know! There is rejoicing and partying like its 2017 (it just may be). UPS and Fed Ex are doing a booming business delivering packages sent from all over the world commemorating the death of Heaven's troublemakers. It is the Antichrist's Christmas and everyone is in the (evil)spirit of the unholidays. Yule logs in the hearth, mistletoe on the mantles, a pig on the spit, the world’s goose is cooked…oh, what fun it is to sing this “slaying” song tonight!

Carols they will sing:
*The First No-Hell.
*Grandma got Run Over by A Guillotine.
*I Saw Mommy Kissing Antichrist.
*Rockin' Around the Baal Tree.
*Antichrist is Coming to Town.
*Satan’s Baby.
*I'll Have a Blue Tribulation without You.
*All I want for Christmas is these Two Witnesses Gone.
*O Little Town of Babylon.
*O Come, All Ye Sinful.
*Thunders We have Heard on High.
*O Come, O Come, Apollyon.
*Thou Didst Leave Thy Pit.

O wait! Look at verse 15, what's that I hear but the Hallelujah Chorus! And the seventh angel sounded; and there were great voices in heaven, saying, The kingdoms of this world are become the kingdoms of our Lord, and of his Christ; and he shall reign for ever and ever.  Now that's some real Christmas music!
Sorry, Anti-Christmas is cancelled. Never mind! The two witnesses are resurrected and ascended, Jesus is the reason for the season.  

I wonder if Wal*Mart will refund all those gifts.

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